Online therapy FAQs: what to expect
Starting therapy comes with a lot of questions, and you deserve answers before you ever fill out a form. Here's what working with me actually looks like, from your first session to how I show up in the room (well, on the screen). If your question isn't here, email me at hello@therapywithemilee.com. I'm happy to answer it.
How to get started
Fill out the form
Tell me a little about you & what's bringing you to therapy.
Hear back from me
I'll reach out within two business days.
Chat for 15 minutes
A free, low-pressure call to see if we're a fit.
Start therapy
We get your first session on the calendar.
How I work
what therapy with me is built on
What is your approach to therapy?
I care a lot about our relationship! Okay yes, I know all therapists say this. But I really mean it: I want to do all I can so that you feel safe & seen with me. I've been told my whole life that I create a safe space for the people around me, and I really try to make sure that's true, because studies have shown that feeling unconditionally accepted in therapy is necessary for change.
My approach is relational, trauma-informed & strengths-based, and I don't like to pathologize. I believe anxiety & depression are often nervous system responses to a lack of safety or control, and that so many of the things we do come from our needs to protect ourselves & stay connected. We'll look at all of your parts with compassion so we can understand why you adapted the way you did. When it fits, I also incorporate EMDR.
Will we talk about my past?
Yes, at a pace that feels okay for you. Relationship patterns develop young! We learn early how to act around others so that we feel safe, and what roles to play with our families & friends. I know therapy can feel scary for this very reason, because facing our past is hard. But we'll find meaning in your current patterns & stresses as we learn how they're linked to your past experiences, and we'll spend plenty of time on what's happening in your life right now, too.
Will we focus on thoughts or feelings?
Both! :) We'll work to understand your thought processes & your beliefs about yourself, and we'll also make room for the emotions tied to those thoughts & beliefs. I'll sit with you as you learn to sit with yourself. I'll ask about your emotional experience, and over time you'll become more attuned to your own feelings. (If you've ever wondered why feeling your feelings matters so much, I wrote about it here.)
Who decides what we talk about?
You do, with my help! You know your experiences best, so you'll be choosing what we explore each week. I want you to learn what it's like to voice your needs, share your perspective & lean into the control that's rightfully yours in a relationship (which can be a scary thing for people-pleasers to face!). That doesn't mean you have to show up with an agenda, though. Part of my job is helping us find the threads worth pulling on.
Do you provide a diagnosis?
I don't give diagnoses, except in two common situations:
- If you'd like to know. At the beginning of treatment, I'll ask for your consent to let you know if I see symptoms that appear to fall under a diagnosis (if I do). I know it can feel empowering or relieving to understand ourselves, and a diagnosis can open the door to further resources or referrals. It can also add confusion or other issues, so it's completely your choice whether to consent.
- If you choose to receive superbills. Insurance companies require a diagnosis for out-of-network reimbursement. This is something I'll discuss with you beforehand, so you're comfortable with the diagnosis given.
Every once in a while, a diagnosis can also help me advocate for you when you need support from somewhere else, and we'd always talk that through together first.
The therapy process
from the first form to the last session
How do I know if you're the right therapist for me?
The free 15-minute consultation is a great place to start! You'll get a feel for how I talk & whether you feel comfortable with me, and I'll be honest if I think someone else would be a better fit. If you're still figuring out what to look for in a therapist, my guide How to Find a Therapist: A Comprehensive Guide walks you through it.
How do I get started?
Start by filling out my Therapy Interest Form with a little about yourself & what's bringing you to therapy. I'll read what you share & reach out within two business days. If it seems like we might be a good fit, we'll schedule a free 15-minute consultation call, a low-pressure chance to connect & ask questions. If we both feel good about it, we'll get your first session on the calendar! (And if I'm not the best fit, I'll share names of other therapists who might be.)
What do I need to do before our first session?
Before your first session, you'll receive intake forms by email. Please fill these out before we meet, since I won't be able to start our first session until they're complete. That's it!
What will the first session look like?
We'll briefly go over your intake forms, and then I'll spend most of the session getting to know you at a pace that feels comfortable. These first conversations will likely continue into the second session, too. Feel free to ask questions or bring a list of things you'd like to cover, or just come as you are :)
How often will we meet?
Weekly, at least in the beginning. Because of the relational, trauma-focused way I work, I see clients who want to meet every week, and after about 6–9 months we can talk about shifting to every other week if it feels right. I understand if this isn't ideal for your schedule or finances. The consistency is important for the approach I use, which focuses on being in the process instead of just catching up on content. Weekly sessions (in the beginning) allow us to build trust & understand your patterns more deeply.
How long will I be in therapy?
There's no set timeline! Every person's therapy is shaped by their own needs, and trauma therapy tends to be a longer-term (yet meaningful) process. Most of my clients work with me for about 1–3 years. Once you've reached a point where you feel confident in the growth you've made, we'll decide together when to bring your season of therapy to an end. If you're wondering why longer-term therapy can be worth it, I wrote about that in Why Long-Term Therapy?
How will we wrap things up when therapy ends?
When it's time to end, I highly recommend a closure session. Because of the vulnerability we've shared, it can be really meaningful to end with intentional reflection: highlighting your growth & naming what we've experienced in our relationship. Goodbyes are hard, but we get to give each other closure (and yes, I might cry too).
Sessions & logistics
the practical stuff
How long are sessions?
Sessions are 50 minutes.
When do you offer sessions?
I offer morning & lunchtime appointments! I'll be moving to Madrid soon, so my schedule is built around US mornings & middays. Because my clients are spread across time zones, you'll find the specific session times for your state on my Alaska, Arizona, Texas, Utah & Washington pages.
How much does therapy cost? Do you take insurance?
Sessions are $175 for 50 minutes. I don't take insurance, but I can provide superbills you may be able to submit for out-of-network reimbursement, depending on your plan. You can check your out-of-network benefits for free here. This is just an estimate. I'm private-pay & provide a monthly superbill you can submit to your insurance yourself. You can find all the details on my rates page.
What's your cancellation policy?
If you cancel less than 48 hours before your session, you'll be charged the full session fee ($175). Life happens, so just let me know as early as you can!
What does a typical session look like?
Honestly, it depends! Some sessions might involve processing something painful, some might be more practical, and sometimes we might spend 20 minutes unpacking a seemingly tiny interaction because it turns out there's a whole lot happening underneath it. We might explore something from your week, a pattern we've been noticing, something from a previous session or what you're feeling in your body. We'll make connections together & slow things down when we need to.
What if I don't know what to talk about?
Completely okay! You don't need to arrive every week with an agenda or an exciting therapy revelation prepared. Sometimes we'll know exactly where we want to start, and sometimes we'll figure it out together. I might ask about something from a previous session, something that happened during your week, what you're noticing in your body or a pattern we've been exploring. Part of my job is helping us find the threads worth pulling on, so you don't have to do that part alone.
The vibes
yes, you can bring snacks
What's therapy with you actually like?
Collaborative, curious & very human. I'm not going to sit silently while you talk or expect you to arrive knowing exactly what you need to work on. We'll be serious when we need to be, and we'll also laugh (a lot!). You don't need to perform therapy "correctly" with me. You can show up unsure of what to talk about, laugh at inappropriate times, cry, swear, change your mind or tell me when something I say doesn't land.
Can I bring food? Get comfy?
Yes! Please eat, drink & let me know if you need a bathroom break. I also really want you to:
- Get comfy. Do whatever helps you feel as cozy as possible.
- Show me pictures of your life. I love knowing what your life looks like, so please screenshare or hold up your phone.
- Read me the texts. Whatever you want to share, I want to hear!
- Bring anything for comfort. A pet, a blanket, a fidget toy, whatever you need :)
What if something you say doesn't land?
Please tell me! I'll apologize when I mess up, check in when I share parts of myself & ask you to help me understand your boundaries in our relationship. Working through those moments together is part of the work, especially if you're used to keeping the peace & not saying anything.
Online therapy
therapy from your cozy space
Is therapy with you completely virtual?
Yes! My practice is completely virtual. We'll meet through a secure video platform, so you can join therapy from a private, comfortable space without commuting to an office.
Where do I need to be during sessions?
You need to be physically located in a state where I'm licensed (Alaska, Arizona, Texas, Utah or Washington) at the time of each session. If you'll be traveling, just let me know ahead of time and we'll figure out a plan together.
What do I need for a virtual session?
A device with a camera, a reliable internet connection & a private space where you can talk freely. Headphones help a lot! You'll get a Google Meet link to join each session, so there's no commute & no waiting room.
What if I don't have a private space at home?
You're not alone in that! Clients join from a parked car, a closet, a bedroom with a white noise machine outside the door or anywhere else that feels private. Please just don't join while driving :) We can brainstorm what might work for you.
Will I still feel connected in virtual therapy?
Yes! Connection isn't limited to being in the same physical room. What matters most is whether you feel safe enough in our relationship to be honest, curious & engaged in the work. We can still laugh together, sit with hard things, notice what's happening in the moment & build a meaningful therapeutic relationship through a screen. For some people, being in their own space actually makes therapy feel more comfortable & accessible.
Is online therapy as effective as in-person therapy?
For many people, yes! Research has found that online therapy can be as effective as in-person therapy for many concerns, including anxiety & trauma. What matters most is the fit between you & your therapist, and whether you feel safe enough to do the work.
Can we do EMDR online?
Yes! EMDR can be done virtually, and I integrate it into online sessions when it fits what we're working on. You can learn more on my EMDR page.
still have questions?
Email me at hello@therapywithemilee.com, or fill out my Therapy Interest Form & ask during your free 15-minute consultation.
♡ Emilee